Quotes from George Burns
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
A True Colorado Story
Older Coloradans all remember Elitch Gardens amusement park. But not many remember John Elitch also owned and operated a very classy French restaurant, Tontoni Restaurant. What was not known by the general public was that every night after closing, leftover food was given to the poor who were waiting at the kitchen door in the alley.
Elitch boasted that plenty of wild game and a lack of game laws enabled his Tortoni to serve virtually any food that could be purchased.
One evening when the Tontoni was particularly crowded, two cowboys came in and were seated. The very proper French waiter brought menus to the two cowboys. The slightly tipsy cowpunchers were stunned. The menus were in French. Disgusted, one cowboy threw the menus back at the waiter and growled, "Bring us a rattlesnake steak, and be quick about it!"
"Pardon M'sieu?"
"Rattlesnake, I said, frog face, That's what we feed on where I come from."
The waiter repeated the order to the chef in the kitchen.
The chef didn't know what to do, so he called the owner. Elitch checked in the refrigeration and returned with two eels. Elitch said, "Give 'em that," he laughed and walked away.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
A True Colorado Story
Older Coloradans all remember Elitch Gardens amusement park. But not many remember John Elitch also owned and operated a very classy French restaurant, Tontoni Restaurant. What was not known by the general public was that every night after closing, leftover food was given to the poor who were waiting at the kitchen door in the alley.
Elitch boasted that plenty of wild game and a lack of game laws enabled his Tortoni to serve virtually any food that could be purchased.
One evening when the Tontoni was particularly crowded, two cowboys came in and were seated. The very proper French waiter brought menus to the two cowboys. The slightly tipsy cowpunchers were stunned. The menus were in French. Disgusted, one cowboy threw the menus back at the waiter and growled, "Bring us a rattlesnake steak, and be quick about it!"
"Pardon M'sieu?"
"Rattlesnake, I said, frog face, That's what we feed on where I come from."
The waiter repeated the order to the chef in the kitchen.
The chef didn't know what to do, so he called the owner. Elitch checked in the refrigeration and returned with two eels. Elitch said, "Give 'em that," he laughed and walked away.
The chef prepared the dinner and when it was ready he notified the waiter. The waiter served the dinner on a silver platter. When the cover was lifted the cheeks of the cowboys flushed. Their dinner stared up at them. The wranglers got a nauseated look and ran for the door with their hands over their mouths.
My Colorado Resolutions 2021
1. I resolve to start and finish (and hopefully publish) my third Andrew Coyle historical mystery.
(The first two are: Murder in the Rockies; Two Miles High and Six Feet Under)
2. I resolve to pick up the dog waste from the yard more than once a week.
3. I resolve to finish eating my vegetables before I eat my dessert.
4. I resolve to read and edit my emails before I hit "Send."
5. I resolve to cheerfully fill my weekly medicine "pill box."
1. I resolve to start and finish (and hopefully publish) my third Andrew Coyle historical mystery.
(The first two are: Murder in the Rockies; Two Miles High and Six Feet Under)
2. I resolve to pick up the dog waste from the yard more than once a week.
3. I resolve to finish eating my vegetables before I eat my dessert.
4. I resolve to read and edit my emails before I hit "Send."
5. I resolve to cheerfully fill my weekly medicine "pill box."
“Hope
Smiles from the threshold of the year to come,
Whispering 'it will be happier'...”
― Alfred Lord Tennyson